Claim
When a teammate's behaviour frustrates you, run an MGI pass — the Most Generous Interpretation of why a good person might be doing this — before deciding the response. The MGI usually surfaces unmet needs or missing skills underneath the behaviour, which become the actual intervention. The default ungenerous read produces grievance, not action.
Mechanism
Frustration narrows perception to the worst-case explanation. The teammate who missed a deadline becomes "they don't care." MGI forces the brain through alternative explanations — "they might be overwhelmed, they might have unclear scope, they might be hitting a skill they have not built yet." Each alternative points to a different intervention. The grievance read points to no intervention except more grievance.
Conditions
Holds when:
- The leader can genuinely consider the alternatives, not just go through the motion.
- The team's pattern is not actually malicious; MGI gives wrong answers when applied to bad-faith actors.
- The leader has emotional bandwidth to do the work in real time.
Fails when:
- The pattern is consistently confirmed by evidence and MGI becomes self-deception.
- Used as a pre-frame to suppress legitimate concerns about a recurring problem.
- The leader uses MGI as cover for avoiding hard conversations.
Evidence
"When I started using an MGI, I liked my kid again. We were on the same team. I came up with a whole different range of interventions."
— Becky Kennedy on Lenny's Podcast, 2026-04-28
Signals
- Difficult conversations open with shared problem-solving rather than accusation.
- Interventions match the actual underlying issue (skill, scope, conditions) rather than punishing surface behaviour.
- Leader's own ratio of action to grievance shifts toward action.
Counter-evidence
Repeated bad-faith behaviour cannot be MGI'd indefinitely; doing so enables harm. The discipline is a starting move, not an end move.
Cross-references
- When addressing a behavior, name explicitly that identity is not on trial — the conversational complement
- Secure relationships are built by repair after rupture, not by avoiding rupture — the move when MGI fails and you reacted badly